Its not freakin rocket science (pt1)

PEOPLE WHO DRIVE IN THE MIDDLE LANE ON THE MOTORWAY

I’ve been doing quite a lot of motorway driving lately. i know the rules that nice mr T(he) Law tells us to follow. but it seems that allot of other people Only have a passing acquaintance as to how its supposed to work, and FUCK IT UP FOR EVERYBODY ELSE!
instead of driving on the left, and using the middle and right lanes for overtaking it becomes

left hand side. trucks, caravans and old people.

middle lane people who want to overtake the above and twats.

right lane....... me.

i do not have a penis car.
(it is my firm conviction that the size or power of a guys car is inversely proportional to the size of his wife’s best friend. I drive a micra. i am not gay. and i don’t piss into a bag.)

i drive a micra. I’m not proud of it, but it get me from A(here) to B (someplace else)
I have to thrape 7 shades out of it in the fast lane because even though the left hand lane is empty (apart from the lorry 6 miles away) there’s some mystery of evolution trundling along in the middle lane, doing 65. their either:

some guy with white hair and maybe driving gloves, probably in a merc or jag

a youngish woman, with 10 to 2 hands, in a 206

some twat with a "baby on board" thing in the back window (or twat tag as i call em)

its against the law to "undertake" on the left so what do people do? they drive right up to them in the left lane. hover just behind them, to make a point (even though anybody thinking this ticktack through would know that they cant actually see you there...duh!)
and then make a grand sweep over to the right lane, tutting and grumbling. floor it past them. Then cut in front of them as close as possible, as they lunge back into the left lane. you may say this is the only recourse we bastions of the motorway have. Well hold on, these people are evidently quite mentally deficient, the last thing we need to do is swerve around in front of them. they may panic and crash and burn. You may say this would be a blessing, but after sitting for 3 hours in a jam because some moron cant drive in a strait line i think there is a better way. nothing amazing, just follow them, find out where they live, and when they get out the car, hit them with a spade. I’m not condoning murder but...... actually i am.
Perform the service, lighten the world, one moron at a time.